So if you ever had the desire to google paleo diet, you probably started reading about three sentences and got this weird look on your face.
I mean, really. Why would anybody ever want to torture themselves and eat this way?
Like most crazy things in life, I did it because:
(choose one)
a) I am a strong, powerful, determined woman and love challenge
b) I have a moral obligation to eat in the way which humans were intended
c) I met a really cute boy who was into paleo
did you guess the correct answer? read on to find out!
So I thought - wow he is a total freak. Does he ever go out to a decent restaurant?? How could I ever introduce him the family and have him over for Thanksgiving dinner?? And how can I raise our future gorgeous children on this diet??
By now you must have guessed that he was amazingly cute...
and had some other good traits, as well.
The man never pushed his thoughts on me or made things inconvenient when we had dinner dates. But I was a little overwhelmed with his passion for leafy greens. If it wasn't for his sausage, I would have taken him for some sort of rabbit decent.
Sausage. I love me some sausage. So that's when I decided maybe paleo was cooleo. I could eat all the grass-fed fatty meats that my little heart desired. And this man had a trailer full of meat. Coolers and freezers full of meat. A warehouse of meat. More meat than I could ever fit into my little body!!
And it just so happened that two weeks after I started locking lips with this cutie, my colleagues decided to put together a Biggest Loser Challenge (which was later renamed the Smallest Gainer Challenge). I was all in. Meat man and I would be Paleo Pals. Week 1 was great (down 2 lbs). Week 2 was better (down another 2 lbs). Week 3 was amazing (down 3 more lbs). I was doing awesome! I was doing great! I felt unbelievable!
and then I had
some chips and salsa,
margaritas,
halloween candy (the trick or treaters were way too late to get any good stuff),
seasonal lager (screw you, Sam Adams).
UP 4 LBS :(
My experimental paleo diet went to the days of the dinosaurs. Stupid Kit Kat Bars.
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